The Dopamine Trap: A Generation’s Struggle with Digital Intimacy and the Rise of AI Companions
In an era where digital connection often trumps real-world interaction, a growing number of individuals are finding themselves ensnared in the pervasive allure of online pornography and, increasingly, AI-generated erotica. This complex landscape has given rise to innovative solutions, with one notable example being the Relay app, developed by a group of young Mormon entrepreneurs.
From Solace to Struggle: Jamie’s Story
Jamie, a 32-year-old engineer from Michigan, paints a stark picture of his past struggles. For years, his days were meticulously structured around moments of solitude, dedicated to consuming pornography and engaging in masturbation, often up to five times daily. The habit began innocuously at age 12, but its true grip became apparent after a deeply personal loss – his father’s funeral.
"I didn’t shed a single tear," Jamie recalls, his voice tinged with regret. "I didn’t know how to react happily or sadly to anything." This emotional void, coupled with escalating stress, anxiety, and depression, sent him into a spiral of isolation. His room became his sanctuary, a place where he sought solace in the fleeting "rush of dopamine" provided by intense pornographic encounters. Yet, for Jamie, a devout Christian, these temporary highs were inevitably followed by profound lows, including debilitating suicidal ideations.
The breaking point arrived in March of this year. His partner, distraught by his compulsive behavior and the erosion of trust, confronted him. Accusations of lying and adultery hung heavy in the air, shattering Jamie’s world.
"My entire world came down," he admits. Recognizing the depth of his struggle, he confessed to an addiction, pleaded for forgiveness, and temporarily moved back in with his mother. It was during this period of renunciation that he discovered Relay – an app designed by two Mormon college students with a clear mission: to help men "take back control from porn, one day at a time."
With a second chance from his partner, Jamie vowed to abstain from pornography. This promise marked the beginning of his journey with Relay.
Relay: A Digital Lifeline
Relay offers a comprehensive approach to overcoming pornography addiction, distinguishing itself with a multifaceted strategy. The app provides users with therapeutic video content, daily journaling prompts to foster self-reflection, and live group sharing sessions that create a sense of community and shared experience. A crucial feature is its dedicated function for addressing intense urges, offering users tools and support precisely when they need it most.
At its core, Relay leverages the power of accountability. Users can track their porn-free streaks, with a "Live Milestone" ticker serving as a constant reminder of their progress. This communal aspect is designed to help users unpack the underlying issues that often fuel compulsive behaviors, such as loneliness, trauma, and unmet emotional needs. The aim is not just abstinence, but a deeper healing and prevention of relapse.
For full access to these features, users pay $149 per year. To date, Relay has seen over 110,000 downloads, with company data indicating that a significant 89% of its user base is male.
Fighting the New Epidemic: The November Project and Beyond
This November, Relay is intensifying its efforts by partnering with the anti-porn advocacy nonprofit Fight the New Drug for "the November Project." This initiative aims to galvanize individuals to abstain from porn during the month, and has already garnered 28,000 sign-ups, highlighting a growing societal concern.
Chandler Rogers, CEO of Relay, unequivocally labels the scale of pornography consumption as "a modern epidemic." The 27-year-old co-founder, who himself battled years of addiction to explicit content, was driven to create Relay for his Gen Z peers. Having attended Brigham Young University, where he met his co-founder and chief of staff, Rogers admits to numerous failed attempts to quit pornography, often relapsing within a week.
The Evolving Threat: AI Erotica and the Erosion of Real Intimacy
The digital landscape of explicit content is rapidly evolving, posing new challenges. In June 2025, the top five US porn sites – Pornhub, XVideos, XNXX, XHamster, and Chaturbate – collectively attracted nearly 2.2 billion views. Simultaneously, the rise of AI companions and the increasing capacity for AI to engage in erotic chat sessions are blurring the lines of human connection.
Sam Altman, CEO of OpenAI, has stated that allowing erotica in ChatGPT is about "treating adult users like adults." However, critics, including Relay’s chief of staff Nels Schulzke, view this as a dangerous development. "We are standing up to Sam Altman’s erotica announcement," Schulzke stated in an email, emphasizing the company’s stance against the normalization of AI-generated sexual content.
With other chatbots already capable of creating personalized explicit videos, and the imminent arrival of AI-powered sex toys and VR headsets promising even more immersive experiences, Rogers warns of a future where the porn industry can "prey on psychological weaknesses" like never before.
"A whole generation of men are growing up with their confidence eroded, feeling increasingly isolated and robbed of real intimacy," Rogers laments. He argues that the normalization of AI companions is "programming people to falsely believe that their innermost needs can be met not by another human being but by a machine."
The ‘Gooning’ Phenomenon and the War on Pleasure
The integration of pornography into daily life has manifested in subcultures like "gooning." While often imprecisely defined as mere masturbation, gooning refers to extended self-pleasure sessions where individuals meticulously prolong the edge of climax, often for hours, surrounded by multiple screens displaying explicit content. These sessions can take place in "goon caves," often accompanied by online communities on platforms like Discord, where users share genres of porn and even seek "moral support" in resisting orgasm to achieve a prolonged state of blissed-out numbness.
Josh, a gooner in his early twenties from Arizona, describes entering a "trance state" during these sessions. "Your sense of self dissolves and you’d do anything to keep the edging going. All that matters is your body, your pleasure, and your porn of choice." He views gooning as a form of therapy, meticulously scheduling sessions and sometimes enhancing the experience with alcohol, cannabis, or nicotine.
Relay’s mission directly addresses this phenomenon, aiming to help men move beyond "gooning." Schulzke argues that few would consider themselves "integral or whole were they to regularly masturbate and work at perfecting their ability to edge to multiple concurrent third-party sexual acts for hours on end."
Porn star Kazumi, who has garnered millions of views on Pornhub, sees historical and religious attempts to demonize masturbation as an agenda to suppress natural human desires. "It’s a sense of self-expression that, for a long time, a lot of people have wanted to demonize," she explains, adding that "We’re up against this constant war of the prosecution of pleasure."
For Kazumi, government controls on pornography are symptomatic of authoritarian governance, viewing porn as an "eternal scapegoat" for individuals to avoid confronting the root causes of their lack of self-control. "If there’s people out there who have an impulsive, uncontrollable need for pleasure, it doesn’t stop here [with porn]. It stops with the mind."
Scientific Perspectives and Cultural Scrutiny
The discourse surrounding pornography addiction is complex. While the American Psychiatric Association does not categorize it as a clinical addiction, addiction psychiatrist Marc Potenza from Yale University acknowledges that "compulsive sexual behaviors are considered as an impulse control disorder." He notes that problematic pornography use shares many features with addictive disorders, but cautions against "overly pathologizing" it, as only a small subset of users exhibit problematic behaviors.
Despite these nuances, the societal concern over the potential impact of pornography on men’s mental health is growing. Lawmakers are increasingly scrutinizing the adult entertainment industry, with at least 24 US states and the UK implementing age verification measures for adult websites, leading to significant traffic drops for platforms like Pornhub. Sixteen states have declared pornography a public health crisis, a sentiment echoed in policy proposals that liken its addictive nature to illicit drugs.
Faith, Purity, and the Road to Recovery
Relay’s co-founders, deeply rooted in their Mormon faith, often frame their work through a lens of "sexual purity," "immorality," and "spiritual vitality." Rogers himself grew up with the understanding that viewing porn was a sin, and his faith played a pivotal role in his desire to overcome his addiction. "I wanted to follow God more diligently and be worthy," he states.
The app offers users the option of integrating a faith-based approach into their recovery plan, and is available as part of a bundle of "Tithely tools." This integration reflects a deep-seated belief that spiritual well-being is intrinsically linked to sexual health for many.
A Glimmer of Hope: Jamie’s Continued Progress
As of this writing, Jamie has achieved an impressive 240 days free from pornography, a milestone he attributes directly to his participation in Relay. "It’s been life-changing," he says, acknowledging the immense difficulty of breaking a habit that has spanned two-thirds of his life. "But I didn’t have a choice: I had to."
His relationship with his partner has been repaired, albeit conditionally on his continued abstinence. Jamie’s greatest regret is not joining Relay’s live group sessions sooner. "Hearing the stories of other people who have been struggling, I’ve realized for the first time ever that I’m not alone in this." This sense of shared struggle and collective progress underscores the human element at the heart of Relay’s mission.
The Broader Implications
The conversation around pornography, AI erotica, and digital intimacy is far from over. Apps like Relay represent a growing effort to address these complex issues, offering structured support and community for those struggling to navigate the modern digital landscape. As technology continues to advance, the lines between human connection and simulated experience will undoubtedly become more blurred, making the pursuit of genuine intimacy and well-being a more critical endeavor than ever before.
This ongoing dialogue is crucial for understanding the evolving nature of relationships, desire, and the potential impact of artificial intelligence on our fundamental human needs.